How's Jami Doing: Daily Update - Issue #2 - 12/1/2022


Cancer does not behave in ways we expect.

Jami and I walked into the hospice care center on Tuesday afternoon. Although she was a bit unsteady and had a bad headache, she walked under her own power. Our goal was to get in, figure out the proper pain medications, and walk out.

Our plans changed.

The cancer is progressing fast. Much faster then I expected.

How’s Jami Doing

  • She has rapidly declined. Even the doctors and nurses were surprised by the diseases progression.
  • Mid-afternoon I spoke with the medical team to get an authoritative answer on Jami’s prognoses. They told me there will be no recovery. Her condition is due to the diseases rapid progression, not the pain medication she is on.
  • I originally assumed the high doses of pain killer were making her groggy and unresponsive. It was not. It’s most likely the cancer in her brain.
  • You may want to sit down for this one… I asked the team her life expectancy. While they can’t give me specific time, they have two general buckets. Days to Weeks and Weeks to Months. Jami is in the days to week category.
  • Because of this news, I’ve asked for all of Jami’s immediate family to change their plans and come down as soon as possible. Everyone should be here today or tomorrow.
  • Early this morning I asked hospice to prepare a plan to take her home. At this point, I don’t think I can do that anymore. Even with our full family team by her side, I don’t feel like we have the capability to keep her comfortable like the hospice facility can. As of 5PM today, I am holding off on trying to bring her home. We will continue to reevaluate as time passes.

This is not the news we want to hear. I wish there was something better I could say, but I can’t.

To Do:

  • Send me messages or text messages to Jami’s phone and I will read them to her.

How’s The Family

  • We are here for her.
  • I’m will be signing up for FMLA leave shortly to spend time with my family.
  • Elliot visited today.
  • Allison will be here tonight.

Closing Thought

Reflect on this quote Jami would say, “There is no point in getting mad at the things we can’t control”. She is such a strong person and a role model to all of us.

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